Long Time

It's been a long time since I have written a blog post. I think I know why. Normally I write blog posts when I am stressed or have problems with girls. Well, since I'm married I don't really have problems with girls. My wife is amazing and I love her so much. Life couldn't be more blissful. But recently I've gotten a little stressed again.

The topic of time management has come back into my mind. I've been seriously concerned with my own progression as of late. Where on par am I in the gospel and in my personal growth and development? Am I becoming the man that I want to become? Am I following the path that God would have me follow? All these questions and more need answers.

We tend to spend time doing the things that we care about the most. Now, we are able to determine what we care about and often times what we actively choose to spend time in we start caring about more. This is a very good thing. It means that we can change our desires and learn to live better lives filled with more enlightening and positive activities. So, this begs the question, where am I spending my time? Where do I natively put time? I've been spending a lot of time playing Assassin's Creed Three. That must mean that I care about it. I've been playing hockey. I've been playing Frisbee. I've been doing my homework assignments. I've been spending time with Ashley and friends. I've been going to Church. I've been going to class. I've been going to work. But that still leaves a lot of off time. Oh, and I forgot that I go to Morris Code as well. That must mean that I care about all these things. What about when it comes to journal writing? Scripture reading? Service? Active listening in classes and at Church? Am I trying to learn the lessons? Am I trying to become the most faithful member and friend that I can become?

I think the answer is no at the moment. Which means that I need to give myself a serious overhaul if I want to become like the Savior. Here's the priority list. God, my wife, my future kids, my family, work/school, church (yes there is a separation between God and Church but not between God and the sacrament), and all other good activities. How can I re-prioritize my time to follow this list? Let's put Assassin's Creed at the bottom. On top of taking up my time I believe it is making my demeanor less affable. I need to keep reading my scriptures as I've been doing this past week boo yah. I need to spend the majority of my time doing homework and being of service. How can I be of service? Around the house I can clean, which is nice. Around the ward however is a different matter.

What service would be best for the area in which I live? I can make cookies and treats. Do people ever need to just be visited and have a friend? Well we all have spouses here so not likely. But we also need guy time for guys and girl time for girls. Are there any guys that I could provide that guy time with? At least talking about extreme sports, video games, the like? How can I become part of anyone's "in" crowd?

The answer? Just do it. I need to plan it and then just do it. Roger that.

Epic Failure

Have you just completely and utterly failed at something recently? Well... I just did.

After storing all that pumpkin from October I knew that we needed to do something with it. So Ashley gave me the wonderful idea of making pumpkin bread. It sounded delicious. And the pumpkin was in the fridge so I had that gnawing sense in the back of my head that it was going bad. I looked at the recipe and it said that it would make one loaf. I thought... but I want two loafs. So I'll double it.

We added everything and then put it in the oven at 325, prepared to not look at it for an hour and fifteen minutes. Two hours and thirty minutes later almost we take it out of the oven.

Epic Fail.

It was still gooey, not burnt. There were huge pieces of pumpkin that I hadn't grounded up all the way. We had to throw them away.

I was kind of sad but at the same time had a feeling of optimism. I thought... well know I know. Now I've learned. And then my wife put the icing on the cake. "Why do we fall Bruce?"

Always be yourself. Unless you can be batman. Then always be batman. And learn from your mistakes. Besides... no animals were harmed in the making of that bread.

Pumpkin

Have I ever mentioned that I am actually quite a cook?

Here is a latest endeavor. Preparing a pumpkin for storage!

I am really excited to make pumpkin pie or cookies. :)

Definite Moral Impact

Do you ever have those times in your life when you want to do nothing else except contemplate what could have been and all the beauty that would have gone along with it? This election has turned me into a ball of jelly. I can't think. I can't work. I can't do anything currently. All I can do is reflect. It's very bad for my productivity, but in the end all I can say is that things definitely affect my moral.

I consider myself an independent. I don't like to listen when people try to tell me how to think. I like to find my own way and reach my own conclusions. I like to push through when others say I can't and I like to resist 100% when people encourage me to give in. But now I find myself at a complete brain failure as the election unfolds before my eyes. I so wanted Obama not to win. Why? Because I disagree with his policies and methods. He seems like an incredible fun and charismatic guy. I would love to know him on a personal level, but I do not believe in his policies as a leader nor his example.

So I find myself incapacitated to further my homework, to catch up on certain jobs that need to get done in my life, or other things that call my attention.

Now I just want to scream and wake up in 4 years haha.

Loving It

So I'm stealing McDonald's phrase... nothing wrong with that ehy?

Can I just say how much I love my job! I go to work where I do web design, web development, and graphic design. One could say that I'm an artist. I'm a digital artist.

So I ask myself... I go to work where I program and design all day and then I go to class and learn a whole bunch of other material and you think that I would be sick of programming by the end of the day. False. What do I want to do when I get home? I want to program. I'm such a nerd! I'm loving life and I love my wonderful wife! That rhythm ed ed ed :). So I've always loved this cartoon. It's so true about what it represents  Ashley wants to get a huge sign like this for our balcony and then yard haha.



In other news Church is amazing and school is amazing and I have some amazing friends. I also have a wonderful family and the Lord is blessing me profusely. But the two things that I really need to work on are keeping a journal and reading my scriptures every single day. I need to set time for those so that they'll get done. Those two will bring me closer to the Spirit and with the Spirit I can do anything.


I also thought this was beautiful. "Trick or Treat!" "What are you supposed to be?" "I'm a panda."

Forgiveness

In the Church of Jesus Christ of Later-Day Saints we have a program set up for all the men. It's called Home Teaching. It assigns two Elders to a companionship and then gives the assignment to the companionship to visit families in the ward each month and teach them a spiritual message. In my personal opinion it is more of an instant support program. It helps everyone in the ward to have friends. Why do these people become friends? Because they are united under a similar case, that of the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Now, as stated before, each month there is a spiritual message shared. The message this month had to do with forgiveness and forgetting. It made me think a lot about grudges and how easy it is to keep them because of pride. At first glance I could not discover any grudges in my own heart. However, upon further reflection of my soul I found that I do harvest some hard feelings. Sad day I know. Now I shall start on a slight tangent but it'll be pulled in no worries. My wife and I watched Brave at the Varsity theater on Friday and walking out of it we met a couple from our ward that had also attended the viewing. I was quite critical of the story of the movie because after watching it I didn't yearn for more. I think the amazing stories are those that leave you wanting, because you want to rewatch it in the hopes to pick up new insights and information. My wife responded to my rantings... oh you and your critique. I realized that I am indeed very much a critic, of entertainment. And of most things in this life. Criticism leads to pride and grudge. These are bad things as we know.

But it's a double edged blade. Criticism with humility can also lead to better products and services. It can lead to making the most out of life and finding the things that you truly enjoy. Criticism can help you define yourself and understand where your path is leading and how to improve. So how do we maintain that proper amount of criticism and keep our humility? I'm not expert in this field nor do I pretend to be, but here is a suggestion that I have recently realized. I do not think that we should criticize others as people but that we can condemn their actions. In fact, it would be very smart not to entrust a robber with your money. But yet people can change, by feeling unconditional love. So I would say that we should find things about entertainment that we do not like or we thought we could improve. That helps us realize, oh, I don't like this. That leads to some self discovery with the ancient Sophicles, "Know Thyself." When we realize why we do or do not like something we can figure out ways to change ourselves. Perhaps what we do not like is something inherently evil or bad and would deserve condemnation and no respect. In which cases we can know for ourselves never to do or create such things. On the other hands maybe we don't like something because we don't appreciate it. I believe that most the talent in this life comes from constant progression in that field or talent. It makes me critical of what others do because I always think in my mind, "It's just because they spent a whole lot of time working on that talent." But does that mean I would have the guts to spend that much time on something?

I feel my thoughts starting to ramble. The point is, be a critique so that you can learn how to become better but do not let that become evil within you. Criticism is not about competition. It's about constant improvement. Expressing your criticism to someone else is a different matter entirely.

Positive Influence

We all have such an influence on those around us. The last weekend has been kind of a "push to the limit" weekend for my wife. She tackled it all like a champion. I am so proud of her and her progress when it comes to doing certain extreme things.

From her amazing success it makes me reflect on the kinds of things we push ourselves to do each day that we are scared stiff of or that we just feel like we could never do. I heard a story in stake conference that really made me think about us being able to accomplish anything that comes in our way. A counselor in our stake presidency spoke about a training that he had to undergo near the end of officer training in the military. He told about how one of the major goals of the training is to teach these soon to be officers that they can do anything they put their minds to.

I've been trying to put my mind towards a variety of things. Some of the things that I have been concentrating on most are work, financial management at BYU, and the writing of music and literature. I've always wanted to be a good writer and a good composer. But I'm not. What does that mean? It means that I need to work harder at these things than others to whom it comes naturally. The thing that separates me and those amazing people out there is natural born talent and/or time spent on their respective specialty. Take me for example. I've been singing since I was a tiny baby. I have spent so many hours training my voice to become what I've wanted it to do. Because of all this time spent my voice has escalated to a respectable level. Many people have complimented me on my voice... because of the time that I've spent on it.

The time that we spend on certain talents is effected by those around us. Fear is my number reason for not developing a gift as much as I can. The scriptures actually caution grossly against this lack of indulgence in a spiritual gift. If we hide ourselves under a bushel not only will we lose that talent but we will be unable to receive others. Therefore we must surround ourselves with those that will always lift us up and help us do better. We need to learn how to push ourselves towards high goals. Line upon line precept upon precept. Here a little there a little. It's amazing how the Lord can help us accomplish so much.

With the Lords help and with an understanding of the positive influence that we can project upon the minds of those around us, I hope to learn how to be a better positive influence towards my future children and especially towards my wife. I want to learn how to help others in such a way that they can feel more confident around me and feel like they can be better. So... how do we give off that aura?